Breastfeeding can be beautiful.
Breastfeeding can be hard.
Breastfeeding can be painful.
Breastfeeding can have health benefits.
Breastfeeding problems can lead to perinatal mental health problems.
Breastfeeding can be beautiful.
Breastfeeding can be heartbreaking.
Breastfeeding can be short-term.
Breastfeeding can be long-term.
Breastfeeding can be enjoyable.
Breastfeeding can be lonely.
Breastfeeding can be expensive.
Breastfeeding can be life-saving.
Breastfeeding can feel natural.
Breastfeeding can seem insurmountable.
Everyone’s breastfeeding journey is different. Some choose to breastfeed but find that there are many challenges along the way. Some choose to breastfeed and do it seemingly without much effort at all. Some choose NOT to breastfeed or do some combination of breastfeeding and formula, which is absolutely fine.
As a breastfeeding medicine physician, it is my job to help find answers to breastfeeding problems, and always to support both the baby AND the mother in this endeavor. I tell moms up front that I can provide a list of tools that may help “fix” the problems, but that does not mean that each of those tools needs to be used or even tried. Doing “all the things” may simply not be feasible amidst the overwhelming transition of creating, birthing, and bringing home a newborn (or any combination of these things, as the road to having a child does not always follow a traditional model).
Though breastmilk and breastfeeding have undeniable health benefits, they can also lead to mental health struggles, difficulty with maternal/infant bonding, and decreased enjoyment of the postpartum period for dyads who encounter difficulties along the way. No amount of breastmilk is worth the mental or physical health of a breastfeeding person, or that of their baby.
Sometimes my job as a breastfeeding medicine physician is to say “it’s OK to stop.” And then to allow that woman the space to grieve or breathe a sigh of relief, or say “no, I’m not finished yet,” and then move forward. There is no right or wrong answer here.
Every time I see someone struggling, I wonder how we can do things differently.
We need to truly “see” women in their 4th Trimester. We not only need to empower women to reach out for support when they need it, but we should provide this support without requiring that they ask. We should anticipate the problems and have active supports already in place and accessible, and make sure women and families know that they are not alone during this time.
I hope that through advocacy, teaching, and directly serving people who choose to breastfeed, I can help move this forward as a priority and create a system in which more women can say that “Breastfeeding can be beautiful.”